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General Terms with Cool Definitions E-mail
(57 votes)
Last Updated ( Thursday, 29 April 2010 )
 
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 General Terms with Cool Definitions

 Cigarette:

A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.

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Love affairs:

Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Marriage:

It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

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Divorce:

Future tense of marriage

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Lecture:

An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Conference:

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Compromise:

The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Tears:

The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine waterpower.. .

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Dictionary:

A place where divorce comes before marriage.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Conference Room:

A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Ecstasy:

A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Classic:

A book which people praise, but do not read.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Smile:

A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Office:

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Yawn:

The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Etc:

A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Committee:

Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

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Experience:

The name men give to their mistakes.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Atom Bomb:

An invention to end all inventions.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Philosopher:

A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Diplomat:

A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Opportunist:

A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Optimist:

A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway See I am not injured yet.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Pessimist:

A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Miser:

A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Father:

A banker provided by nature.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Criminal:

A guy no different from the rest... Except that he got caught.

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Politician:

One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

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Doctor:

A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Boss:

Someone who comes early when you are late and is late when you come early.

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Classic:

Books, which people praise but do not read.

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Compromise:

The art of dividing a cake that everybody believes he got the largest piece.

***********

Committee:

A group of individuals who can do nothing individually but sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

***********

Conference:

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

***********

Conference Room:

A venue where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody agrees later.

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Dictionary:

A place where pay, reward and success come before work.

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Doctor:

A medical person who kills your ills by pills and kills you with bills.

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Etc.:

A grammatical sign used to make people believe that you know more than you do.

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Experience:

The name men give to their mistakes.

***********

Father:

A banker provided by nature.

***********

Lecture:

The art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to that of the students without going through the brains of either.

***********

Life Insurance:

A contact that keeps you poor all your life so that you can be rich after.

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Marriage:

An agreement where a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

***********

Nurse:

A person who wakes you to give you sleeping pills.

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Office:

A place where you can relax after your strenuous homely life.

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Philosopher:

A man who torments himself all his life to become wise after death.

General Terms with Cool Definitions

Politician:

Someone who shakes your hand before the elections and your confidence after.

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Saturday and Sunday:

Are strong days as the others are weak days (weekdays).

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School:

A place where Papa pays and son plays.

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Smile:

A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

***********

Tears:

A hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

***********

Yawn:

The only time a husband can open his mouth.

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School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you
can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and
a woman gains her masters.

Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by
feminine waterpower.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the
Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds
of either"

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody
believes he got the biggest piece.

Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.

Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and
everybody disagrees later on.

Father : A banker provided by nature.

Criminal : A guy no different from the rest...except that he got caught.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence
after.
Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic Books: which people praise, but do not read.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually
do.

Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide
that nothing can be done together.

Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher : A fool who pain himself during life, to be spoken of when
dead.



Users' Comments (3) RSS feed comment
Posted by miricah, on 06-07-2011 05:18, , Guest
wooooooowwww i have really liked the definitions!!! so interesting.....
 

Posted by MAHNOOR, on 24-03-2010 13:53, , Guest
:grin it is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Posted by payamulhaq, on 07-03-2010 02:56, , Guest
:) sorry for telling  
but some of the jokes written here are repeated  
if you can that it should not be repeated it your kindness. 
thanksssssssssss.
 

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