Yes, we all know you?re totally in love with yourself, but they reveal too much. If you must wear these, throw some shorts over ’em. You, my friend, are not at a rodeo bar!
Apparently, he learned everything he knows about gym attire from reading about the Football League… in 1986. Even Pele doesn?t approve of this. These super short dolphin shorts lack style and, um, substance.
Yes, super-short shorts are the worst, but don’t go too far the other way. These are baggy, saggy, and look shabby.
Denim is honestly the worst possible material you could pick to work out in. Let’s see, heavy, restrictive, and weird. Perfect. No seriously, just get some well-cut gym shorts and we can all go back the elliptical machine. You are not and I quote ?Mark Wahlberg?.
The bandana, clown pants, and high boots are bad enough, but it’s the silly muscle T-shirts ("Salman ka salaam!") that really pushes him over the top. I’m sure he feels ultra hardcore, but he looks like a sidekick from a South Indian film.
Perfumed and prancy, with gel spiked hair. The first bead of sweat comes out in purple and white colour. So much for the set wet and a spiffy look.
Sir, try searching for ?muscle tees?. And STOP shopping at Baby gap!
We get that people want to sit naked in the sauna. Fine, go for it. But do you really have to lie on the bench with your legs spread out?
This bloke just came out of a VIP vest advertisement, except for the gaping holes at the back. The tucking in doesn?t help either. To all you Sallus and Sanjus, keep it to your room.
You?re supposed to take them off before you hit the road. Otherwise, you look like you work at an adult video store.
They come out fresh from a rap video, wearing a full brand tracksuit and matching shoes. Just need a little bit of bling, and models to pose and you?re good to go.
Come on guys, the pit-stained T-shirt is so gross that it’s become a cultural trope that only equals one thing: total slob. If the pit stains mystify you, we’re here to tell you they’re caused by an antiperspirant, not sweat itself. Ask yourself which is worse and choose accordingly.
Dude, you don’t have to show us your nipple just to show off your massive pythons. Scale that tank top up a bit and get some coverage. We’ll still be able to see those muscles ripple. Not that we want to.
14. The guy with no underwear.
If you?re a big, muscle-bound brute, everybody can see that, including the girls. These types of fellas often also have a gigantic, hockey-equipment-sized duffle bag that they carry around everywhere to show people that they work out a lot. It?s full of smelly, sweaty clothing; canisters of PED-like powders that make them look stronger than they are. In fact, it?s more like a purse than a duffle bag. Full of dirty clothes. So you basically look homeless and strong. Excellent!
