Funny New Year’s Resolutions

New Years Resolutions

for 2009

This year, I resolve to:

Always replace the gas nozzle
before driving away from the pump.

I will always “check for paper”
when leaving the restroom.

I will try to drive closer to the speed limit.

I will always wear clean underwear, “just in case”.

I will keep an extra safe distance when driving behind police cars.

I will no longer park the BMW
next to fire hydrants.

I will start drinking less beer

I will stop buying useless stuff

I will try to drive more carefully