When we look at old photographs of when we were 5, or 10, even 18, we realise we had all the time in the world for unnecessary things. In fact, we even had time for finding the perfect group of friends to hang out with, talk about people we didn?t like and think of the perfect comebacks to shut them up. But things are different now. Or should we say we are different?
Fortunately, we’ve grown up or moved on, and changed from that, in retrospect, pointless existence. Friends or enemies, rumors and gossip really don?t matter anymore. Here are 9 possible reasons why.
As we grow up, a little bit of distance enters every relationship. Best friends stay there, but sometimes other friends take over. With time, we begin to alter our steps. We don?t meet often and we don?t talk often.
2. You begin wondering if you can have more than one best friend, or if you have one very close friend and other ?acquaintances?.
It?s easy to start talking to an acquaintance, or sip a coffee with a colleague but to make lifelong friends isn?t possible. You hardly meet those kind of people anymore. And the idea has changed from making BFFs to finding people you can have good conversations with – basically, people who offer good company.
3. The lines between friends and best friends become blurry. You might hang out a lot more with your friend than your best friend.
We have separate circles now. One from the gym, another from work, and another from graduate school, and we end up hanging out way more than we?d hang out with our close friends.
Gone are the days when we?d go out of our way to make new friends. We would text people to show we like keeping in touch, show our enthusiasm for making exciting plans like road trips. But we don?t feel the need to make that extra effort anymore.
5. We’re aware of the fact that the more the number of friends, the more complicated it gets.
It?s taxing to handle too many friends, to remember birthdays and most importantly, dealing with the expectations of so many people. There?s no way you can make everyone happy. You get tired. Don?t you?
6. We?ve acknowledged the ugly truth about growing up – a few close friends are just enough.
Forget 25, by the time you hit your 20s, you realise not everyone you?ve considered a friend is actually a friend. The people who have your back and will be there to help you at 2 AM are very few. These are those friends you don?t need to message every day – they are your constants and probably irreplaceable. They get you and you get them. And you?re satisfied with this, and it?s become a comfort zone of sorts.
The point is to finish work and get home on time. The focus is on doing your thing, earning money, and appraisals. Gossip then become distractions. Thus, a streamlined social circle and a few friends are more than enough.
Plotting and planning, abusing the enemy will take so much time from our life that it will mess up our systems. Moreover, it?s better to stay away from such negative emotions and keep to yourself. Haters gonna hate, but make no time for enemies.
There are people I dislike, but they aren?t my enemies. Enemies are people who we think about, but these are the people we?d rather be indifferent about. I prefer to tune out when they are around. I don?t plan to throw them off a cliff. I just don?t care.