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Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time

The topic of dialogue sounds absolutely ludicrous, because we all know that having a dual relationship status is unheard of. But what if wanting the best of both worlds was something that could be managed?

Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time

For my part, that sounds a bit foreboding, given that I?ve never been in a relationship before. Images of couples hand in hand somehow release the butterflies of joy in a relationship and even if it?s not me in the picture, I can?t help but feel inspired by it. Love is a feeling that all of us are thirsty to experience even if it comes and goes like birds migrating in the span of a year.

My parents and my brother have often told me to thank my lucky stars that my singledom is still within my grasp. I was never sure what they were talking about, but I guess they were alluding that the grass is always greener on the other side. For example, when we are in university, we can?t wait to get employed and have a decent paying day job. But once we begin our professional careers, we can?t help but miss the fun times of college. I guess it?s the same with having a special someone – we do miss being single once in a while. However, not everyone is allowed to expose it indiscreetly.

Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time


Being single is generally considered being free from commitments while taking the time to pursue the laws of attraction. It gives us the time required to find a suitable partner who we might make our special someone.

But it’s not exactly freedom; more like how our mind chooses to function. Sometimes we feel lonely, unattached, and vulnerable in a world of potential partners. Somehow a sense of dread takes over as we wonder what the real reason might be. Could it be undesirable physical attributes or could it be an unpleasant personality that tends to be a turn off? Yes, being single has its insecurities despite the freedom from constraints that relationships might present.

Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time

Emotional drama, jealousy, and heartache are just some experiences couples have to endure while settling their differences and sacrificing their own interests to make it work. Not all relationships last a lifetime, with many couples breaking up when they can longer keep the spark alive. That?s when you think; perhaps I was better off single anyway…

I remember when I first starting dating. It felt ecstatic. It felt like the beginning of a new adventure as I was experiencing something new. Getting to know one another, enjoying each others’ company, spending quality time while learning of and sharing interests – it was wonderful.

Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time

The bubble burst when we had conflicting emotions, and uncontrollable egos. Blackmailing, threats, verbal showdowns, screaming matches and shaming were all part of it. It was horrible. A horrible end to an idyllic beginning. But why can’t I have the best of both sides? Is it too much to ask for?

I want the freedom from all drama and dark emotions but I do want someone who will hold me tight when I am down.

Why I Want To Be Single And In A Relationship At The Same Time

Perhaps wanting both ends of the scale is something attainable through a complicated and unconventional arrangement, but will it serve any purpose? Being single and being taken are two entirely different arrangements, each with its gamut of issues. They are two sides of one coin and cannot be had together. The fear of reaching a deadlock in a relationship is probably why we might want to enjoy singledom. Alas, this wish by most is obsolete

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