Your brother is your first friend and a great one at that. He will have fun with you. And at the same time, he’ll scold you when need be. Growing up with him was one hell of a ride. But when he decided to move away for studies or work, your life suddenly changed. It was heartbreaking and took a while for you to accept. If you have a brother who lives far away from you, this is for you.
He?s busy and so are you. There?s work and other priorities. In fact, it gets even worse when he stays in a different country because it?s difficult to coordinate across entirely different time zones. His morning is your evening; your night is his morning. That kind of stuff is just awful.
Thanks to Skype and Facetime, you regularly get to see him. But a bad internet connection is a true spoiler.
Even if you both have spoken for hours, there is something that you miss out. You forget to tell him the minor details about your crush or about annoying relatives. No phone call has ever been enough and it never will be.
There is just no one to take your side or understand your point of view and your only support system is far, far away.
When you stayed together, you both would gossip about everything under the sun, right from irritating neighbours to curious relatives and pretty much everything in between. It?s different now. You are all alone and there is no one to share all the crazy family gossip with. Family get-togethers have become boring for you.
The very thought excites you, but the uncertainty of it makes you sad.
You feel weird every time you see a picture of him celebrating his birthday or small victories. You feel happy for him. At the same time, you miss him and miss being a part of his routine life.
He?s in a far away land and has fever. The very thought kills you. You feel helpless. Secretly, you want to take the first flight out and visit him, but you know that?s not possible.
Holi and Diwali are your loneliest days. You have endless childhood memories revolving around festivals, like bursting crackers together, eating chocolates, making rangolis and clicking pictures, and it?s difficult to do it all alone. Festivals are the time you get nostalgic and miss big brother the most.
All the ice-creams, chocolates, pastries and donuts stay in the fridge. All for you. The worst thing is that you used to yell at your brother for eating it all, but now you just feel like sharing it with him.
11. When your brother is away, your parents expect you to be on your best behaviour.
They tell you not to fight with him because he?s all alone. They expect you to become more responsible. Additionally, your brother also expects you to spend more time with mom and dad in his absence. To sum it up, the dynamics of your life begin to change.
Maybe it?s his way of showing that he?s keeping a check, but he wants to know all versions of a story. When he?s away from home, he takes an extra interest in family events, arguments and gossip. That?s just him.
Saying ‘miss you’ isn?t enough. Sending him long texts doesn?t serve the purpose either. It?s a thought that you live with and you can?t explain it. Sometimes, you get really emotional and prefer to keep mum about it. Life and relationships change as you grow up and staying away is probably a part of it.
14. No matter how much time you spend with him, your bucket list still has at least 10 things not done, and those automatically go to the ‘next’ bucket list.
It?s difficult to tick off everything because he?s only coming home for a few days. No matter how long he comes for, the bucket list remains incomplete.
You get used to having him around again. But the moment it?s time for him to go back, you feel sad again. In fact, it takes a while to get used to the emptiness again.
16. You ensure that your brother-sister rituals don’t take a backseat when he’s in town.
All normal siblings have rituals, for example, going to visit grandparents or going to your favorite bar. No matter what, you never compromise on your one on one sessions. They are full of internal jokes, leg pulling and endless laughter.
You live in the hope that probably next year you will somehow manage to be with him on Rakhi. But, you can only hope.
On the occasion of Rakshabandhan, this post is dedicated to brothers and sisters the world over!